14th of June

Dear Vincent,

I'm so mad right now I'm in tears. I just want to scream. It's hard to be concerned with you when you push me away. I wanna know the reason why you're sad, I want to cheer you up. I want to be with you. :(

Last night, you said you'll just eat and then we'll talk after. But then after eating you slept. I really don't mind you sleeping on me. I understand that you're tired from work. You also told me that you're having a hard time in balancing career and relationship. I do understand that and I'm okay to be the second priority.

I appreciate it when you say good morning before going to work. It makes me feel loved. I like it when you send me messages whenever you go to the restroom. I like when you ask me for random selfies and make fun of it. I like it because that's how you express your love.

But tonight, I'm angry. I really am. I understand that your phone died that's why you didn't inform me that you're on your way home. Then when we talked, it took a long time before you reply and you told me that you were checking my Facebook. You told me you liked it. I know it's shallow but I didn't get notifications. Or maybe you didn't. I'm not expecting anymore.

And then you replied:

"Hayyyy pati dun tampo ka?"

So bawal na pala ako magtampo. Ang hirap. Ang hirap maging concern kung kamusta ka na, o kumain ka na ba, o kung busy ka.

Then you said, antok ka na without even asking how I am.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mahal kita pero masama ang loob ko ngayon. Mahal na mahal kita pero kulang na ata yung patience ko.


Karla